Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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