10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize