She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
