erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
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