my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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