You're so nebulous sometimes
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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