this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
