I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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