He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
