then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
