Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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