you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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