My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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