she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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