Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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