I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
