Do you still have your period?
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
