Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize