it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
