some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
