Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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