no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
