So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
