I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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