It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
