Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
