Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
