no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Randomize
