Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize