tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
