operation harelip BJ is a go
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
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He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
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When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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