I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
