I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
