East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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