I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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