call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Text me some of your sweat
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
