I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
