Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
