We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
