No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
