Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
