You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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