I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
