well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize