what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize