Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
