At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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