I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
