I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
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