Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
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